Chapter 8 Miscellaneous Conversations

Wishful thinking

Wayne: That is one heavy boat!

Me: Yeah

[Note to self: Ask She Who Is Small But Mighty {OK, beg if you have to} ‘Honey, can I please get a new boat?’]
*****
On fame

(Japanese accent): Debon?

Me: Yes.

(Japanese accent): Debon Bahkuh?!?!?!!

Me: Yes.

(Japanese accent): Ohhhh! Debon Bahkuh very famous!!!!
****
It’s a small world

Me: By the way, Carole Westwood said to tell you: “Hi and Merde”.

Val Bertrand: What!?!?! How do you know Carole?
****
Why we all drank too much

Carla (bartender and surf photographer of renown): Are the mojitos OK?

John and Eddie (Team Scotland): These are better than what we had in Havana!!
****
Ouch

Spectators (in sympathetic pain): Oooooooooooooooooooooo!

Announcer: If the judges scored for wipeouts, that would be a ten!




****
Are you sure?

Jeff: You know who you remind me of? Steve Martin.

Me: ????
****
On the better part of valor

Jimmy: Why don't you try Jeff's boat?

Self to myself (after spending 5 minutes cramming myself into Jeff’s boat): Yeah, I could probably roll this boat.

Myself to self (trying to remove the foam implosion-slash-suicide bar that has me jammed into the cockpit and succeeding only after at least a minute of struggle): Umm—I’m not sure we can get out of this puppy if things went bad.

Self to myself: Bad?!? No way! You know you can roll!

Voice of daughter Molly, aged 12, who knows about the unfortunate surfboard-to-the-head incident in Noosa a couple of years ago (with all the seriousness that a 12-year-old can muster): “Daddy, you be careful, ok?”

Me: Um, Jimmy? I don’t think so.
****
The brotherhood

Brent Daniel (Team Canada): Dude!!

Me: Dude!!